Our farewell day was gloriously warm with the sun forcing us to remove the silly winter garments that the Scottish sun would have us wear. Andy and I returned to the wall, intent on catching as much of the sun's rays as possible. Lying along the little walls that they had with the sun beaming down on me just made me smile and remember earlier days of my youth where we would lie lazily on the grass or play in the pools..
Anyway, today we explored some of the pretty gardens along the wall and then momentarily visited New Girona, which I must say wasn't as pretty or impressive. Heading back to the old city we paused for an ice-cream, having checked out at 10am this morning we weren't able to head back to the room for a quick nap like the rest of the population of Girona so we were taking a break. But, these two pigeons were hovering nearby and I tried to shoo them away by shaking my water bottle at them (yes, I am that mature). However, the bottle somehow slipped out of my hand and went careening away and just missed hitting these poor Spaniards who were passing behind us. Try apologising and explaining what happened in Spanish! Thankfully, they were okay with it.

Just before setting off for the bus station, Andy and I headed back to the lioness of Girona for a quick kiss and to say good-bye. Waiting for the bust that would take us to the airport, I thought back on the past three days in the breath taking city. I would miss her, the sun that had shone so cheerfully through the day and the peacefulness that the city filled me with...

Waking up to the light peeking through the bottom of the curtains I am reminded of my days in warmer climates. Andy and I are dressed and down for breakfast by 9.15am and out into the glorious sunshine of Old Girona by 10am-after a quick check of emails etc, as being students of the modern world we are totally reliant on our technology.

Andy and I left armed with our cameras and ready to explore the old city. We spent the morning walking along the remains of the wall, proof that Girona was once a fortified city. If I thought the views from ground level were amazing, I was mesmerised by some of the views from the wall! I couldn't resist stopping frequently, either to take the view in more or to take a snapshot. One thing that I noticed was how the city had splashes of colour dotted around it. From the patterns on the wall to the different coloured walls to the streams of washing hanging out of balconies, the city was sprinkled with colour. That, and the glorious sun that had decided to shine on us made me exceptionally happy.

After our mornings' activities we paused for ice-cream before heading back to exploring the streets and stealing snapshots of the wonderous city. As we wandered along the cobbled streets we noticed one had been made in the early 15th century and was still in perfect condition. Again, another observation that makes me wonder about the British ways...

On our way back to the hostel for the afternoon Siesta, Andy and I passed the Cathredral. Now, this particular building kept catching my interest as we walked along the wall so I was delighted to see it close up. As we trekked down it's one hundred steps ( yes I did indeed count them all!) I couldn't help but feel energised. There's just something about old buildings that made me smile. That, lights and rivers.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After our quick nap, we headed back to the city and had a little wonder around a couple of the shops. You can tell that the culture here is more purer is some ways as many places had little wooden puzzles, old family games and everyone is always so willing to help even when they don't understand English.

For supper we headed to a quaint little restaurant, "La Força Vella" where Andy persuaded me to try snails. Curious, although terribly nervous, I tried them. I haven't made my mind up on them just yet, to be honest the look of them was slightly sickening but they weren't too bad. But, I was rather pleased that I was brave enough to try them! Following supper we headed back along to the Onya River and passed by the Lioness of Girona. This is a little statue that travelers who wish to return are to kiss the bottom of the lioness' bottom to bring luck to them so that they may return. It's a fun little legend that I just had to take part in.

So, that's day two just about over now and I think I may just have fallen in love with the old city.

All packed and ready to go, Andy I set off for Prestwick Airport where we due to catch our plane to Girona, Spain where we would be spending the next two nights. We arrived in plenty of time, checked in without any fuss and then headed to the departure lounge. Then we realised something was wrong.

Shortly after passing through security and arriving in the lounge, Andy realised he had misplaced his wallet which contained all his Euros in. As you can imagine, this caused a bit of a problem as we weren't sure whether the wallet had fallen out in the car or whether it had been lost/stolen at the airport. Anyway, we couldn't do much about it so we decided to just try and forget about it until we returned home on Saturday. Thankfully, not long before we set off I opened up an account with a Spanish bank that allows British citizens to withdraw money in the local currency without the high exchange rates so we would at least be able to withdraw money when we arrived. The rest of the journey proved uneventful, and we even got a set of three seats to ourselves!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We arrived in Girona twenty minutes ahead of schedule and promptly bought our bus tickets to the city centre. It always amazes me how clean other countries are, it's one thing that I always seem to notice when I arrive in new countries. It almost makes me ashamed to be associated with the mess in British. Anyway, walking along the little cobbled streets Andy and I headed to our hostel. Now, this was nerve racking for me. Firstly, I had never been in Girona before, nor a hostel, and had horrid images of slum-like dormitories where we were expected to share a bedroom with several strangers. However, when we arrived I was so taken aback. The hostel that Andy had booked (mostly for its location and low price) was beautiful and looked like a hotel. We even had our own private room with an en-suite!

After ditching the luggage, we headed down into Old Girona for my first taste of a real Spanish city. Well, I wasn't dissapointed. The romantic, stone city was amazing. Andy and I wondered around for a bit, with him showing me some off his favourite places nearby. We had both left our cameras in the room so I couldn't capture my first view of the breath-taking city. Anyway, off to bed now, feeling pretty hopeful for our adventures tomorrow.

Right, as I already said I have this new camera and I'm attempting to learn how to take beautiful shots and up until about an hour ago I was rather content just uploading my favourite pictures to Flickr, Facebook etc. That said, I was happy, until my boyfriend bought himself a new journal. Now I want a pretty journal-perhaps with parchment paper?-and a beautiful cover so that I can create a 'book' of my work.

I can just picture it, the picture pasted on the page with the date and location of photograph neatly printed beside the picture using a fountain pen. *Sigh* I sometimes hate how when someone gets something and you suddenly just get this inspiration for a use of that object. Silly human habits.

Anyway if you're interested in seeing my first attempts that I took yesterday feel free to check them out on my Flickr account here. Comments are always welcomed, help me to improve!

Now, I'm not a photography freak and my skills are limited but I spotted this little canon last year and just fell in love!

With 14mp, 14x Optical Zoom and some manual control it certainly was an upgrade to my previous compact digital cameras. Like a shadow, I am rarely without my camera and I have been keen to develop my skills with the hope of taking some unique pictures so after much consideration I decided to spoil myself yesterday and bought it! *big grin!*

Watch my space for pictures of my experimentation...

The rustle of sheets
accompany the ensemble of clocks:
an echo of my emotions.

I toss and I turn,
The light slowly tickles my feet.
Smile, it begs.

Months pass,
days are swollen up in black holes-
unnoticed.

The creeks of the house gradually dim,
The moon shines her light upon the sleeping figures-
Her light exposes my red-rimmed eyes.

She transcends into my vaulted safe,
Her hooded eyes weep.

A movie plays through my mind,
Forgotten days of days spent together.
The cycle of life moves on…

© Heather R Ellis
March 2010

Today I found myself sitting in Ninewells and bored! ( My brother was seeing a doctor and I was the designated driver) So, like I often do when I get distracted,  I began to watch the people as they dashed, stomped and trudged by. People watching is something that fascinates me, watching how each one does certain things and how each react to another. Society is an interesting network of relationships, principles and beliefs. These are all key factors that socialise us in order to shape us into our perception of what society wants us to be.

Anyway, as you can expect a hospital holds a wide selection of people. There were the little old couples who were dressed up with their swaying skirts and bundled up in all their winter garments, the nurses who were swapping gossip on their break whilst trying to keep their crumbs off their tunics and the distressed relatives who are waiting on loved ones as they repeatedly glance up the corridors...

Then there are the medic students. Now, this group of people stands out, drawing my attention from the little old couple I was watching. Although like myself they are students armed with notepads and pens, they carry with them an air of superiority. Badges of pass swinging, the group strides in relentless pursuit of their career. Although any degree is competitive, Medicine is particularly competitive. And this group knew it. These students will be the future doctors and GPs of our cities, and it's rather nice to know that a) they have to know their facts or they would fail and b) that they, like me, did once start off as a student....

Our honeymoon. Nothing special, just a modern hut in a complex at Victoria Falls, where every morning we rose to the lilac rays of light falling across the red polished floor as the sun filtered through the Jacaranda trees. It was paradise: the beginning of our new life. We were staying at the cottage for a week, enjoying each others company before returning home to Salisbury where I would be packing up my possessions to move into our new home in Northern Rhodesia. The ten-hour drive to the breath taking sight had prevented me from ever seeing the falls previous to my honeymoon; it was our wedding present from my parents. The peacocks wandered towards us, their confidence hardly surprising when we had the braai going; I had already collected at least half a dozen of their glamorous feathers that were left stranded around the cottages from the local party. I wasn’t too fond of the gudos though, they had a tendency to surround me whilst I surrendered, forced to call on Jeremy, my clumsy knight, to rescue me. Our second meal as husband and wife was a traditional meal of steaming sadza with stew and marrow bones the size of a toddler’s fist, served with a bottle of chilled white wine. It was a pleasant week, but as the end loomed nearer I began to get flutters about the upcoming months’ trials…
James worked in the mines in Northern Rhodesia in Chingola, at the Nchanga Mines Open Pit and we would be starting our new life together in that area. At the young age of twenty-two I was well accustomed to the sheltered lifestyle of a fairly affluent family in a community I had lived my whole life. Next week, however, I would be migrating to an area entirely unknown to me. James reassured me that the women there were welcoming, describing our enticing new home. But the daunting event of moving still made me falter; would I cope in my new role? Packing up our belongings from the cottage, the houseboy loaded our bags into the car. His young eyes well accustomed to the arrival and departure of newly weds, brandishing bags heavier than most of his meagre possessions added together. Warmly smiling I awarded the child with a tip, his eyes glowing with gratitude, tatenda chikwashuro.
*
Dressed up in my navy linen suit, James and I drove to Chingola and our new life together. The six-hundred miles lead us to a foreign area, an isolated community of expats from all over. As we crossed the border into the country that was later to become known as Zambia, we pulled up along the road where James captured my youth as I stood in both Southern and North Rhodesia. The next time I would pass through the border the countries would be know as Rhodesia and Zambia. Passing through the town that was then known as Broken Hill, I wondered about my new home, with my new responsibilities as a wife. Idly, my mind questioned my ability to provide and make James pleased. Of course, I wasn’t going to suffer myself to merit his happiness but I would try at least. As we neared our new life the trees became denser, the road bumpier as we left the Great North Road. Parts of the ground slithered menacingly, thin waves hissing dangerously. I was a relatively outdoorsy person but those vindictive legless beasts could make me collapse just crossing my line of sight. Ian, my elder brother, frequently teased me and once tortured me with a dead one. He cut the lights, carelessly flung the limp body into my box room and shot a blank bullet outside my door. The echo created the illusion that I had been shot sending me into a fainting spell. Awakening I saw the long cadaver hanging over the bed, inches away from my exposed face. Screaming, my heart momentarily stopping, I passed out. Ian was severely punished for his devilish act, since then I panic at the simple thought of the deadly hiss and venomous fangs.
As the sun transcended the equator allowing the moon to fill the sky we drove into our new life. The electric lights flickered, declaring the community a modern imitation of the city life from which I had come. We had passed through some primitive towns on our way up where the few lights were run by generators. At least Nchanga was a modern mine, not the archaic village that I feared. My exhaustion level high, my energy seemingly siphoned by the car, I stumbled into my new home blind to its beauty and promise. Tomorrow I would explore, introduce, unpack, and set up my new residence….
*
Rising early to Jame’s soft snoring I began to acquaint myself with the house. As Mrs. Rowena Parker I was in charge of directing the servants-two maids, a cook, a gardener, and a houseboy- and handing out tasks. It was the lady of the house’s responsibility to manage the house, a role I was unaccustomed to. Isolated in the bush, with only the community to socialise with I was anxious of introducing myself badly. Stepping into the spacious kitchen, its floor icy on my naked feet I squinted into the half lit room, curious about the black puddle on the floor. A selous mongoose skittered out the room, its presence unnerving. Flicking the switch, I bathed the room in light, screaming as the puddle transformed into the deadliest African Snake, the rovambira. Thankfully the mongoose had killed the creature; otherwise I would have been instantly paralysed by the fifteen foot assassin, whose single bite would have killed me in a matter of hours. Welcome to the bush, home to even more murderers than the African city of my childhood.
As I adapted to my new surroundings and attended socials at the local hall I began to familiarise myself with marriage life. We had Scrabble nights at each others’ houses, shared stories of bad experiences with servants and riots and formed a bond to our neighbours who were experts at our new roles in society. Limited media coverage sheltered us from the riots and grenade attacks in major cities in Sothern Rhodesia, hiding us from the two legged killers. I learnt to control the household with the grace of years of experience, hosting small parties and discovering full independence. Being married to a mine worker provided me with opportunities to learn of cultures from distant countries, the chance to discover the simple joy of being one’s own person in a new world.
Married life was different to childhood and adolescence; it demanded stamina and perseverance as husband and wife learn to negotiate lifestyles. James and I passed its audition, surviving the civil wars of our country; the changes of government, saw Southern and Northern Rhodesia change their names as they divorced. We remained united, watching our faces age as we weakened. It was on our sixtieth anniversary that the bush overpowered civilisation and destroyed our seemingly eternal bond. James surprised me with a pair of diamond earrings whilst we were on our daily walk. Catching the moonlight they shimmered, lighting up my face. It was my fault, everyone always says that afterwards but in my case it was true. Brushing my silver hair behind my ear I knocked one earring from my ear-I hadn’t put the hoop in fully. The delicate gem jumped to the ground in murderous descend. Sneaking into a large pile of decaying leaves, the diamond twinkled teasingly.
“My earring, I’m sorry Jeremy.”
“It’s okay. Let me get it, it’s just leaves-“
His knees creaking he knelt over the bundle, smiling his contagious smile he pulled faces at the slime and faces drawing laughter from my frail lips. Giggling I playfully nudged his foot accidentally knocking him into the pile. He laughed, eyes lighting up. A black blur touched his arm knocking James to his back as the murderer indifferently slithered away.
*
That day James passed away, the venom had instantly paralysed him and within twelve hours killed him. Last week I went to the complex where we spent our honeymoon and said my last farewell to him as I sprinkled his ashes over the falls. His death was a turning point in my life, rather than flee from the legless beasts I had taken to standing boldly in their path determined to overcome my fear. James would have been proud.

Meanings
Chikwashur--miss                                    Rovambira--black mamba
Braa--barbeque                                          Sadza--a meal made out of maize
Gudos--baboons                                        Tatenda--thank-you

© Heather R Ellis
November 2009

2

All the others are together, only I remain.
Then I see you- and everything changes.
I’m bound to you by despair and hope,
I’m caged by magic, Fate’s cruel joke:
I can see but never touch.

Others discover my hidden truth,
Shake their heads with pity, their eyes mocking my attempts.
Why can’t they see that I’ve no choice-
To break my heart trying is easier than to do nothing.
My life is not mine to control:

Destiny is the captain of my ship,
The course was set when first I saw you.
His orders are clear to all-
Harsh, unjust, non-negotiable-
I can see but never touch.

The Sea shifts, Fate’s lover is near.
She softens, hope arises, this could be the day,
She caresses Destiny; he too is turning a blind eye,
Time torpedoes me to you, heart beating,
so close, I can feel your breath…..

Bang!

Wickedly the lovers laugh.
Arms embraced, as one, they mercilessly taunt me
Always will I be their hostage, they snigger
Gleefully reinstating my boundaries:
My life is not mine to control.

You wander past, barely a glance at my broken heart
Slowly I am giving up the fight.
Why fight when there is no chance of hope?
Puppet, that’s my name in the show presented by Destiny and Fate.
Come one and all to this circus that is me.

© Heather R Ellis
January 2009

Today the dam burst,
its wall crumbling
as the ladybird’s wings fluttered.

I am exposed.

Futile attempts to seal the cracks,
I rebuild the wall with a sponge.
But they see through the holes;
judging.

As soon as I knew
a protective barrier encircled.
The quakes come now,
their pressure forces the shield to erode.

The sand blows away,
dissolving my mask.
I stand alone.
Vulnerable
when the others come,
with their concerned flood of emotions.
I try to tell them, but

My teeth weld shut,
my tongue freezes over,
drowning the words in ice.

Others survive the ceremony of goodbyes,
why can’t I?
It’s only a natural disaster,
The cycle of life.

My broken mind erases the day,
the pain eventually subsides.
Unnoticed,
the pressure gauge builds up.

© Heather R Ellis
December 2009