Have we lost him now?

He's deteriorating more rapidly than we expected. Each day I spend with him is another day that I see him slip that little bit further away from me. My brother, the last biological link I have to my father is fading. More and more I see him confused in his surroundings, unable to dress himself or, at times, even control his bladder. It's hard sitting by and watching my seventeen year old brother sitting slumped over in the chair, shaking so hard that he is unable to hold anything. To have to help feed him at times because he cannot managed holding the fork by himself. Granted, these are the worst days that I'm describing but each event has happened in the last week.

With a hospital visit already in the last couple of weeks and one a possibly on the cards last night, I'm wondering how much longer my mother can handle the stress and emotional turmoil that this is creating. How my mother can continue to spend most nights checking hourly on my brother whilst remembering what is going on in my life and still managing to spend time with my other brother I do not know. With talks on the table of long stays in the hospital for Callum to have an EEG to finally get to the bottom of his deterioration, I'm wondering how much longer Callum will continue to manage things on his own. I just hope that he stabilises soon as what he is currently doing is not living. Well, except on the occasional bright day of his.